together

This morning was spent with good friends. Hard questions and conversation. It's cloudy and gray outside, almost reflecting our feelings. Hurt and grief, waiting and unknown, wrestling with what has happened or is happening. We spent our time together trying to describe and understand. I'm glad for moments like these where we can share, not that it immediately makes everything better, but at least we are together.

As we asked each other, "What do you need right now? How can we be there for you?" I liked how my friend responded something like this, "People ask me how I'm doing today. I'm not sure I know in this moment. I know this season is hard. I think in a year I'll look back and know how I was feeling. Maybe ask me how I was yesterday. "

Time. Healing takes time. Joy and pain coexist. It's important to experience it, to not hide from hardship. That in itself doesn't necessarily make it easier. It's still hard. I've spent the rest of my morning thinking about my friends and our conversation. I certainly do not have immediate answers. Only promises.

To my two friends, I promise to be there for you, to ask you what you need. When you need to talk, I will listen.  When you need silence, I will be quiet. When you need to talk but don't know what to talk about, I will ask questions. When you need distractions, we will get ice cream or watch movies and crochet or take a walk. When you need hope, I will encourage. I promise to pray for you. I am praying for strength to face this season. For comfort and peace when it doesn't make sense. For hope and healing in the midst of hurting. I love you when life is good and hard. If you let me, I will be there for you. If you don't let me, I'll probably keep calling and texting, knocking on your door. Trying to love you with food. Hope that's okay. Love you, friends.

"I remember that the answers aren't necessarily as important as the questions and the company, and that if we do find answers, we'll find them together." (Shauna Niequist from her book Bittersweet)